You never know when the sting of dating rejection is going to get you. But if you enjoy online dating, then you probably have had this experience. You meet someone on a dating site, get excited, meet for a first date that in your mind went really well. The next day, you send a text to tell her you had a great time and would like to see her again. Crickets! Or she says she had a good time too but just didn’t feel the chemistry. I’ve been on both sides of this one, and neither feels very good, but it’s definitely worse to be the rejected one.
Sometimes you can shake it off, but other times you just want to crawl into a hole and disable your online dating account (I hope this isn’t just me!) Let me share some of my strategies to help you through dating rejection.
Take a Break
You don’t have to feel like you’re running away, and you certainly don’t have to feel bad about yourself. I use this time to re-evaluate what I’m looking for (fun times, hookups, a friend with benefits, or a serious relationship). I also focus on what makes me feel good, engaging in my passions outside of dating.
Talk to a Friend
Online dating can be stressful, especially if you’re new to the game. If you have a friend who also uses sites to meet potential partners, talking to them about your similar and different experiences is a great way to minimize the pangs of being rejected. Everyone has their dating woes.
Learn from the Experience
It’s a good idea to reflect on not only why a date didn’t work, but also on what did work. For example, I learned that spending too much time messaging before actually meeting someone (or dating more than one person at a time) made me overly anxious.
Don’t take it Personally
This can be a hard one, but think about this: you don’t know how many other people your date is in contact with. You also don’t really know very much about a first date and they don’t really know who you are, so there’s no point on dwelling on the “what ifs” or the “if onlys.”
I prefer not to date multiple people at once because it feels too overwhelming, but a lot of people follow the don’t-put-all-your-eggs-in-one-basket method when it comes to online dating. I get it! When you do get rejected, you have other ladies to focus on. That said, I’ve learned to go on another date soon after a rejection because who knows, the next one might be just who I’m looking for!
How does dating rejection affect you? Do you have any tips you can share?