You might be surprised to learn that kissing is more often than not how a woman decides whether or not she wants to sleep with you. It communicates many things to her—whether she likes your scent, and whether you are imaginative and generous in bed.
Your first kiss will turn her on—or off. Keep these tips in mind when you lean in.
Take your time.
Guys, always remember that even if a woman is really revved up and raring to go, making her wait and taking her arousal higher is an art.
That’s the difference for us between ho-hum sex, adequate sex, and mind-bending sex. Women can go through the motions, and even have orgasms and enjoy themselves, without being anywhere near their potential for arousal. Some women don’t even know how high they can get because they’ve never had that kind of lover.
Kissing isn’t something to get over with. It’s a good idea to forget about sex entirely when kissing, and be totally present as if the kissing is the end game.
Kiss her often.
Whether you’ve just started fooling around, or been together for twenty years, make sure you are paying attention to her by frequent kisses.
Just because you’ve done every dirty thing in the book, it doesn’t mean the sweet thrill and intimate satisfaction of the kiss ever loses its shine.
Vary your kissing.
If you are moved to kiss the top of her toes when she’s putting her stockings on, do so. Press her palm against your lips. Brush her hair with your mouth when parting. Open your mouth just a little and press it against her ear. Kiss the tops of her breasts at a red light when no one is looking. When she IS looking, quickly kiss her scarf, or her teddy bear!
Kiss her in that friendly way that familiar lovers have, a quick peck and a squeeze. But take her by surprise before she leaves for work by going in for a long one. Kiss her with a hundred tiny fluttery kisses, and kiss her hard in the garden when she’s not expecting it.
You can keep a woman’s blood rushing for you just by remembering to show her the affection you feel.
Take charge, but let her set the pace.
You don’t want to be so shy as to be a blank blackboard or a limp rag. Dare to make moves, or she won’t know you’re interested.
But don’t just move in like a bulldozer or a vulture. Express your interest and affection, but then follow her lead. Pay attention to the pace she sets, whether she wants to take it slow or wants to go full-steam ahead.
Tame your tongue.
Your tongue is an important sex organ, but your t-girl doesn’t want a slobbering Great Dane swallowing her whole.
Use only a little bit of tongue until you’re at that point when she is opening her mouth as wide as she can because she wants to take you in deeper.
Use your tongue to gently coax her teeth open, to touch the ridge of her tongue, to tenderly touch her open mouth, then pull it back. Don’t keep pushing your tongue around her mouth and cutting off her ability to breathe.
Use your tongue as an erotic tease. Develop your artistry by erring on the side of restraint. Proceed slowly with every tongue gesture, and pay attention to her response. If she’s holding back or wiggling to get away or coming up for air, dial it down. Less is more!