As the world collectively continues to learn the complicated but simple and clear truths about transgender sexuality and humanity, it becomes interesting what new spaces of experience and intellect that come to light. And maybe don’t even come to light, yet some to the dark places in people, and do distressing or undescribable things. Or delightful things, when new decisions are made, and new behaviour is directed.
When I was in a sex club recently, it was quite a nice mix of all manners of sexuality and identity. There were quite a few cross dressers and trans gendered people, on top of a happy amount of cisgendered men and women, and the vibes were nice! But I noticed a few things along the course of the evening, and the first was that, due to the filtering of certain spaces from certain energies, it was established that trans people could go places that I couldn’t, as a cisgendered male. And the cisgendered females were allowed to enter these spaces. It was then immediately apparent that that cis men don’t have a SLIGHT number of privileges that some other people in the world do, yet I am simply making a microscopic observation for the sake of my article, and I do NOT want to imply for one split second that these privileges can counterbalance all the other sacrifices and struggles and suffering and straight up death that trans folk have been dealing with since time immemorial. But there was the recognition of a small space where trans bodies were given access and only cis men weren’t.
We are not in a world where there are enough places and times for trans people to be absolutely open and accepted everywhere, so of course the answer right now is this: take some of the privileged space AWAY from cis-men, who have MORE PRIVILEGE than anyone else in the world, and give some of it to trans men and trans women (and women too, while we’re at it). This is a rebalancing that is required for civilization to pretend it practices what it preaches and honors what it promises.
Furthermore, when I left the area where cis men could not enter, I went to the swimming pool to take a dip. Then, another interesting moment of unique access unfolded: I saw a trans friend of mine in the middle of a threesome with a man and woman. I then observed how they could possibly play with both men and women and other trans people in ways that cis men could not comprehend beyond their imagination, but could experience a slight facsimile, if willing to receive anal penetration. Which, truth be told, is NOT a practice that the average twenty-something young male is educated to explore willingly and as hungrily as his quest for pussy, let’s just say. (We can collectively hope and work on changing this, my people! The male G-spot is in the anus! Let’s get some toys and lady fingers up in there, for all the guys missing out! Sorry, I digress.)
The revelations I experienced were beyond typical articulation. There was a blurry, beautiful, brutal, bold and bonding reality to the separations and connections that were cultivated for the transgendered body experience. I could see them being loved and touched and embraced as equally as anyone else, and I saw otherwise. Nothing I saw was violent or inappropriate, but I saw subtle spaces being built by a few. And but of course, it always goes both ways (between people. Gender-wise, there’s WAY more than two ways it can go!!!)
I say all that to say: cis men, do NOT misbehave with any jealousy or obnoxious envy based on the slight special status a trans person MIGHT be offered in a few particular spaces in this infinitely insane world we all live together on!
Don’t hate: congratulate when everyone ejaculates!