Did you watch some hot trans porn last night, and immediately send a dirty message to a sexy trans woman on your dating site? How did that go? Did you get a reply?
Sending women, trans or cis, messages on dating sites should not be a reactionary move to something you saw in porn or even the tingle you felt when you saw her profile pic while browsing.
If you seriously want a reply, in hopes of a hookup or something more, put a little thought and effort into your message before you press SEND.
Before you message a trans woman…
…create a great profile for yourself. I can’t count how many times I’ve received messages from men who have only a few lines in their profile, and some not even a profile pic. This reflects oh so badly, and women will take you for lazy, desperate, and… well, it doesn’t really matter because you won’t get a reply.
…know what you want. Do you want a one night stand? Are you looking for an ongoing casual arrangement? Maybe you’re looking for something serious. It’s important to know what you want (and write this into your profile) so you don’t waste anyone’s time. Please don’t message a woman who wants something more than you do—not cool.
…read her entire profile. Sure, it’s tempting to shoot off a quick message as soon as you see a hot pic of a trans woman, but the man who comments on more than her looks is likely the one to get a reply. Even if it’s only casual sex you’re after, she wants to be treated as a person with a personality and interests. Make your message personal, based on her profile.
…think about the competition. Most women receive ten times the amount of messages a man does, so she’s going to be selective about who she responds to. A carefully crafted message is going to stand out from all the “Hey, beautiful!” and “What are your plans tonight?” kind of lackluster messages in her inbox. Write, rewrite, and edit before sending.