Is Sex on a First Date a Good Idea?

You know you want to. You’ve been surfing the net to find the perfect transexual connection. Your dick has been hard all week from the sexy back-and-forth texting and teasing. Now it’s Friday, and you’re about to meet up with the beautiful trans woman you’ve been dreaming about.

But en route to the pub where you’ve agreed to meet, you start wondering if you should wait before getting down to the dirty. There are lots of great reasons to wait for sex. But here are some in defense of first-date sex.

Should You Have Sex on a First Date?

Yes, when the intention is a hookup.

If you met on a hookup specific site like, have chatted with the purpose of casual sex, and have both intended to do so, then yes. It would actually be silly to decide to have a more traditional date instead.

That doesn’t mean one of you can’t change your mind. You might not have the chemistry you hoped for, or might not like each other in person—if that’s the case, you won’t want to move forward with sex. But to suddenly announce that you’ve decided to wait a few dates before fucking when the purpose of getting together was sex in the first place would be overkill.

Yes, when she wants it.

Obviously it’s not just up to you whether you have casual sex. It’s up to HER. If she wants to hook up with you and that doesn’t change when you’ve met in person, getting lucky is in the cards. Enjoy!

Yes, if the chemistry is right from the start.

Chemistry isn’t always obvious—it doesn’t always ignite instantly. If your TS date is shy or has had negative experiences with men from online dating, or if you’re gun shy after a messy divorce or a bad date, you might not feel the sizzle straight off the bat. That’s okay, lots of hot lust starts with a slow simmer.

It can take time to assess sexual compatibility. But if the chemistry is clear from the get go for both of you, dive in!

Yes, when sex is the primary need for both parties.

If she’s in medical school and you’re moving to Malaysia next month, then it’s quite likely both of you are online looking for sex because you need sex, not for the possibility of a more serious relationship.

It’s not always obvious what another person is looking for, or even ourselves. We might long for love but find sex easier, or want sex only but feel pressured by social and religious constructs into using a relationship app instead of the hookup ones.

Sometimes, one or the other is something of a surprise or accident. But most of the time, autonomous adults decide what it is they need or want, and if both of you are dating because you need sex, then great—tonight’s the night!

Yes, if you’re both sexually adventurous, sexually active, or polyamorous.

You might both be looking for the right spark for a more serious relationship, but that doesn’t mean you don’t want to have sex right away. Lots of people enjoy sex immediately. They can tell a lot about whether the connection is worth pursuing further from their experience.

So being open to, or looking for, love and intimacy doesn’t mean that you won’t both want sex tonight.

Tell us about YOUR experiences with first-date sex!

Tell us what you think

Notify of
1 Comment
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments