“Dating while trans” is a phrase that has come to mean: it’s difficult to date when you are a trans woman. But it doesn’t always have to be that way. We talked to three couples, each involving one transgender partner, all with unique backgrounds about their journey to relationship success.
Jerome and Mia
“We actually met at a friend’s birthday party that was a sex party! Mia was new to town, and she was trying to meet people in our local queer community,” Jerome explains. When we met I thought she was so sexy. She had an exotic look that I was very attracted to, and still am. I found out she was trans that very night. I didn’t care, in fact, it made her a bit more attractive to me! We dated casually for about a year, still seeing other people, before we decided to take the plunge into monogamy, and we’ve never looked back. Now the only problem is covering up how we met to our families.”
Alison and Michael
“I found Michael on TSmeet.com. I had been on there for kind of a while, a few months maybe, and had been dating around and hooking up casually,” Allison, who is a transgender woman, tells us. I wasn’t looking for anything serious, or at least I thought I wasn’t. He actually sent me a sweet first message about how we could eat spaghetti like in Lady and the Tramp, since I listed that as one of my favorite movies on my profile. I told him, maybe not yet, but let’s meet up for a drink. I liked his forward attitude. When we met I was completely unprepared for how adorable he was. We kind of hit it off right away and have been dating ever since.”
José and Mary
“Mary and I met at work. We had been working for the same nonprofit for about a year when I finally worked up the nerve to ask her out,” says José. I actually had no idea that she was trans when I did that. I was simply attracted to her bright green eyes and the friendly attitude she always displayed at work. She told me on our first date and I was a little surprised, but I wanted to get to know her anyways. We kind of took the slow road, getting to know each other emotionally and physically very gradually and carefully. Now we’re living together and have an awesome polyamorous relationship.”
If you are in a successful trans relationship, we’d love to hear about it in the comments.