Just the Tips

Tips for Dating Pre-Op Transexual Women

Sexy Fishnets

Many transexuals think of themselves as a woman long before ever undergoing SRS and even those who never plan to have the operation will still think of themselves as a woman. As Chaz Bono (formerly Chastity Bono) puts it:

“It’s what’s between your ears, not between your legs.”

We are the gender that we feel we are, despite what’s going on down there.

This brings me to… engaging with a trans woman, and the etiquette that is required. While wading through the many misconceptions about trans people and the issues they face, it’s important to be mindful of their feelings as we open ourselves up to new learnings.

You should never ask directly if someone has had “the surgery”. It’s way too personal. A trans woman will want to know you are interested in all of her, and when she’s comfortable she’ll open up about where she’s at in her journey. Instead, ask about her pronoun preferences, about her feelings, and about some of the struggles she faces.

One of the things many trans women complain about is that all men care about is surgery because they find it so fascinating, but this takes away from the intimacy and chance for a meaningful relationship. Don’t get me wrong, trans are like everyone else, in the sense that sometimes a one night stand or a casual hookup is all she wants. This is where ts dating sites come in handy, where you can be very specific about what you’re looking for, whether you’re a transexual or a man looking to meet a trans woman.

Back to the the “pre-op problem” many ts ladies face. Men must understand that trans women live in their new identity long before having surgery (which may or may not include genital changes, breast reduction, a hysterectomy, or other modifications) while others may never wish to have any surgery at all but will still identify as a woman.

Just because a woman is transexual doesn’t mean she wants to discuss every detail, especially with a casual hookup. When I want a one night stand, it’s because I don’t want the deep, emotional connection. I just want to fuck, plain and simple. It’s about satisfying my sexual needs not my emotional needs. I think most of you know what I’m talking about.

So unless you have a serious interest in a trans woman, please don’t get all Q&A about “the operation”. Quite frankly, it’s none of your business, until she makes it so. Showing a woman respect is the first step in getting to know her, and making her comfortable in opening up about her self – all aspects of her self.

Read: Do’s and Don’ts of Dating Transexual Women

TS Lovers: Do you talk about SRS with the ts women you date? How do they respond?

Tell us what you think!

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Lola Pageknight4444ReneeLolaBobbi Recent comment authors
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knight4444
knight4444

By the way, it’s not a bad idea to do a personal background check on an internet potential meeting because I actually briefly communicated with a TS M2F and found out they were in prison (I won’t reveal why), but it was a federal charge and it was UGLY! So my advice is to listen closely because there are scam artists a plenty out there! As I’ve said before, some M2F people have been emotionally damaged by society and they sometimes go totally totally wrong.

Lola Page

Thanks for the tip knight. Have you tried doing a background check on someone since then? Are there sites for that, that you would recommend?

knight4444
knight4444

@Lola the situation with the individual with the federal conviction was here recently. I would recommend TS Dating, it’s very well known and they have thousands of members. I haven’t gotten a premier membership but I will soon, I’m a romantic at heart lol.

Lola Page

Here’s the link for that one.. http://tsdating.com

knight4444
knight4444

LOL, like I said before unfortunately many transgender women are so emotionally scarred by family, friends, society as a whole many of them aren’t even close to having a normal relationship. Many M2F find life so difficult they lie and can’t be honest, not even to themselves. Please don’t misunderstand me, I’m not saying all M2F are like that but the world can beat you down so badly you put up barriers to protect yourself. But I’m not one to blame the world for all my problems , we have choices! if you choose to be fake, chances are that’s… Read more »

Bobbi
Bobbi

When one has been beat down so many times there comes a point that even the strongest person can no longer get up. I believe that we have very little choice in life, that our lives, our destinies are pretty much laid out for us with very little wiggle room. Not everyone should be in a relationship, I was in one years ago and I lost that person to cancer but lately I have come to realize that I should never be in another relationship again and that is for the best and so I have stopped looking for human… Read more »

knight4444
knight4444

Oh brother, yawn

Bobbi
Bobbi

There comes a point when one has been beaten down, kicked and hurt (by life) that even the strongest person can no longer get up. I do not believe that we have much control over our lives or our deaths, that our destinies our laid out and we have very little wiggle room to alter it. There are those who are better off not getting into a relationship or another relationship with another person and I am one of those. I had a mate some years ago and that person passed away after a short battle with cancer and maybe… Read more »

Renee
Renee

Interesting?

knight4444
knight4444

Is this Renee from California? If so, we need to talk.

Bobbi
Bobbi

The way you feel about the Women, and we are Women on those dating sites, is how I feel about the men; they seem to be there to play games. That is why I no longer waste my time at those sites. I am far more likely to meet someone at a store, at the mall, at a flea market or a hundred other places. But the problem is that the men I do meet just want sex and nothing more, I am at a point in my life that I want a LTR, a husband, someone to take care… Read more »

knight4444
knight4444

Well @bobbie, I’m not Mark Harman and I wouldn’t want to be if I could, but it seems we’re on the same page, wanna chat? lol

knight4444
knight4444

@Bobbi, thank you for the invite, I got your address, please delete it from here ASAP, theres a few nuts out here.

knight4444
knight4444

oopppss, sorry I meant ”Mark Harmon” btw I like Harmon as a actor, lol

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