You met while out one night, or online at a site like Find Hookups, and the experience wasn’t terrible. You ended up going on a few more dates, the sex was okay and you had some fun, but now you’re ready to move on for whatever reason. How do you say goodbye for good when your hookup doesn’t want to let go?
This can be one of the most awkward situations in dating. It’s uncomfortable because we don’t want to feel bad about rejecting someone, but sometimes that person you’ve spent time with refuses to catch a hint! If your attempts at “the fade away” (which I don’t recommend) haven’t worked, and you’re still getting texts and calls, try these tips for getting rid of a hookup who leave you alone.
Be Upfront and Honest
Tell the truth? But what if it hurts? The fact is, sometimes a woman you’ve had chemistry with really does want to know the truth, no matter what the reality. And in this kind of situation she’s going to keep on you until you come clean. She might even be contacting you, while knowing full well that you’ve lost interest, simply because she wants you to man-up and tell her.
So try a little honesty. Tell her that you aren’t feeling the chemistry anymore, or that you’ve met someone else, or whatever it is that’s turning you off, within reason. There’s no need to bring up anything specific about the sex or a person’s appearance, just try your best to lay down the truth. Sometimes they just need to know the WHY.
White Lies when the Truth Fails
Still getting unwanted messages and come-ons? When the truth doesn’t work, and you’re not ready to be a jerk and totally ignore this person you might want to try another tactic. I’m not talking about about lines like “You’re too good for me”or the “It’s not you, it’s me” bullshit.
Tell them something that has the potential to turn them off you entirely. Two of my favorites: You’re still in love with your ex, or you’re into a fetish that you’re sure will disgust them. Hell, tell them you’ve contracted herpes if you have to.
The Full Block
You’ve already tried all this? Then you know what to do: block their phone number, block them on facebook, and block them on TSmeet.com or whatever dating site you’re using. I also recommend avoiding places where you know they frequent.
I had a hard time doing the full-block with one crazy ex because I actually wanted to know when they were contacting me. I was getting nervous about their intensity and wanted to keep tabs on just how crazed they were getting. But in most cases, the full block is very effective at achieving your goal.
Anyone have stories on this topic or other ideas for shunning the ex-hookup who just won’t go away?