Does Dating a Transexual Mean you are Gay?

Sexual Identity

The question of homosexuality comes up a lot for men who date or have sex with transexuals. Let’s start with this: You can be a man who has sex with men and NOT be gay. There, now that that’s out of the way, lets explore the topic a bit more in depth. Your sexual identity is for you and you alone to determine. If you are gay, you are the sole arbiter of your sexuality. If you’re unsure, try having some safe sex with men, as that will surely shed some light on the subject.

No one is 100 percent gay or straight, or exactly 50/50 bisexual for that matter either. There are gay men who have and will have sex with the occasional woman because they like her and find her attractive, and there are plenty of straight women who have or will dabble with lesbian sex here and there. The idea that men must be 100 percent straight all of the time in order to consider themselves straight is antiquated.

The Transexual Attraction

Surely for some men, transexual women represent a way to explore their “gay side” in a way that allows them to assert to themselves that they are indeed still straight, but exploiting this as loophole is a cop-out. Gay men for the most part aren’t attracted to transexual women anyway as gay men are attracted to men and the male form, though they are often comfortable with gender bending drag queens and cross dressers who still possess male parts aren’t necessarily off the menu for some.

Transexual women tend to avoid having sex with self-identified bi and gay men for the very reason that they tend to want to interact with their penises if they still have them. If your primary interest in transexual women is based on watching tranny videos of she-males topping men, you’re going to have a difficult time finding a transexual woman that meets that ideal, though there are plenty of “for-hire” people who can accommodate that desire.

Forget Labels

If you’re dating and in a relationship with a transexual woman, it doesn’t make you gay, any more than it makes her gay. She is a woman, you are a man. The need to categorize everything is unhelpful and unhealthy, whether you’re straight, gay, bisexual, pansexual, omni-sexual or whatever other label others may want to apply, if you are two people who have developed feelings for each other, that should be enough. Labels really aren’t helpful in this era.