Just the Tips

How to Stay Focused during Sex

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There are so many reasons that people engage in sex beyond the basic primitive desire. It’s not always for love or for nothing, it often lies somewhere in between.

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Whatever the reason, one thing you can count on sex for is to be a great stress reliever. It was a long time before my current relationship, where I went months and months with nary a hookup. Now, with regular sex in my life, I can say I feel a overall calm energy in my life, and I do believe I can thank sex for that.

With all the stress every person everywhere has to deal with on a daily basis (not including unforseen tragedies) it can be challenging to let that all go in the heat of passion.

I’m certainly guilty of thinking of my to-do list while sucking a cock, or worrying about tomorrow’s deadline while bending over and taking it from behind. This happens, but it does make sex less enjoyable. Truth is, I don’t always come when I’m not in the moment. I have to make a conscious effort not to let my mind drift, and maybe you do to when you’re with a trans lover.

Tips to Help You Stay in the Moment 

Make eye contact. This should be a priority, but just like the mind drifting, the eyes tend to do the same. When you feel your thoughts straying, look into her eyes (unless you are behind her, of course!) Smile and make that all important connection.

Engage in sexy talk. Don’t all of a sudden mention how nervous you are about tomorrow’s doctor’s appointment or an important meeting at work. Keep the conversation dirty and flirty and about what’s happening in the now.

Focus on the task at hand. Whatever you may be doing—sucking her cock, caressing her inner thighs, kissing her toes—put your all into it. Channeling all your energy into a specific action can take on a meditative quality that will keep you present.

Concentrate on your goal. If you want to make her orgasm, it will take concentration. You will need to be in tune with her body’s reactions, her moans of pleasure, her pulling away or leaning into your actions. This required attention will keep your mind off this week’s laundry list.

Enjoy the comedown. When all is said and done, don’t roll over to check your phone for incoming texts or emails. Besides being rude, it doesn’t let you absorb all the delicious benefits of post-coital coupling. Even a one night stand will enjoy a cuddle session afterwards.

What helps you stay in the moment? Please share in the comments!

Tell us what you think!

Tell us what you think!

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