Stories

Transgender vs. Cisgender Feelings

Couple Embracing in Bed

Yay for me! I went on a date with a super-hot trans person I had a crush on for like the last six months!

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They were very courteous and graceful to me, I was so flattered. And in so many ways, it defied typical dating convention.

It was awesome, there were times when I was the feminine recipient, and there were times when they were the feminine recipient.

There were moments of masculine chivalry from both of us. There were moments of pure human connection, free of gender roles.

It was just great! We laughed, we shared pain, suffering and agony, we joked, we complained, we opened up, and we got closer together.

A little hand holding went down too, it was naughty and nice. I was so very satisfied in every way with the date. I think they were too, I swear!

But I was thinking of one other thing when I was there: do they feel what I feel for real?

I wasn’t sure, but it made me think in general, even though generalities are nothing to base one’s life decisions upon… I still had the general thought:

Do trans people develop feelings for others in a different manner than cis-men or cis-women?

It may be the exact same, or it may not be at all!

Why couldn’t it be some undefinable mix of the two, as well? It probably might be more leaning towards that reality, but who really knows yet?

I don’t think there is a database of transgender sexuality statistics that can answer my curiosity as yet, but there should be one!

I don’t believe that trans people are drastically unique from any other identity of human, not at all. But there’s got to be some subtle differences.

To say that a man’s body and a woman’s body is the same thing is to not be scientifically accurate. They may even be 99% the same, but the 1% difference holds a universe of possibility, promise and potential.

With trans people, the complex and unique combination of chemistry and hormones must make for a particular type of person who occupies a place that is not one that the mainstream man or woman is traditionally taught to prepare space for, sexually and emotionally. But I do because it feels right, and it’s what I want to do, god dammit. And that’s all I need to follow my feelings and find out how fast, slow or whatever else a friendship and a relationship can be found in the fun adventures with a transgender friend!

Yay for us both!

Sincerely yours,
Addi Stewart

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