Pardon me, mes amis. I apologize for my enthusiasm and passion. But this story just reminded me of something I needed reminding of.
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In porn, there are rules that cannot be broken without forfeiting the possibility of being respected and honored by your peers. Ever in life!
“You’ll never work in this town again!” is a real thing in certain industries and lifestyles—trust me, and please believe it! Especially on film.
Film extends from movies to still-camera stuff. Directors and photographers are pretty much the same types of people, regardless of genre. There are obvious differences, but on a certain level they operate the same as anyone else in that power position of perspective.
And even though I was in a situation where I was being a professional pornographic actor, and being my sexy-ass self… I had to calm it.
The boundaries of a transgender person should be respected as perfectly as any other person, regardless of the situation. This was a reminder.
I did a photoshoot with a trans friend last year at a famous pub just off Yonge Street. It was beautiful and pleasant from the moment I walked into the venue that afternoon, and I was very happy to peel my clothing off and get down to nudie-flick business with this very knowledgeable photographer.
Oh, did I mention that I shot a porn with this photographer the summer before? So yeah, we have been intimate together. It was my first time with a trans person with penis-in-vagina intercourse, and I was apparently still feeling some leftover lust for them.
But they were there to shoot my picture. That’s it!
I was nude and writhing, and getting all cute and naked on the pool table, and they were right above me, right behind me, right beside me—it was all so hawt and steamy!
But they were in a different head space, so I kept reminding myself: just because they were with me before, it doesn’t mean they have to be with me again! Even if they are trans and have had sex with me and seemed very attracted to me, and I am attracted to them—and all of that is true—it still doesn’t mean that you can fuck them on this pool table after the photo shoot is done.
I was really educated by the speechless but evident reinforcement of boundaries by this person during our interaction. And near the end of the shoot, after I got dressed and we were hugging to leave, they made reference to their relationship that was going so very well, and I was happy for them.
It was a good reminder to get that reminder that everyone’s boundaries are bulletproof, no matter your history with them. Just because you were with them before doesn’t mean you will be with them again… unless you both consent to such action!
If not, then it’s just the pictures in your mind that you will have to enjoy… which are hot as fuck!
In love,
Addi Stewart
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