Some of you might be saying, “No way would I ever spank my trans girlfriend!” but hear me out. Up until a few years ago, the thought of a man spanking me seemed juvenile at best, masochistic at worst. Well… that all changed in one moment, and now it’s something I have enjoyed with many lovers.
One day I was with a boyfriend who always brought out my playful side. During role plays, I would address him Mr. ____ and he would play along. During one of these scenes, I broke character and asked if he’d ever spanked a woman. He said no but caught me eyeing the belt in his jeans lying on the floor. He said, “Oh… that’s something you want to try!” Until that moment, I really didn’t know that, but in that instant I said, “Yes,” and quickly crawled out of bed to retrieve his belt.
When it comes to kinky sex, you really never know where it’s going to go. Finding and exploring your limits takes time, but if you’re with the right lover… it can be a lot of fun, and very satisfying. Here are a few spanking tips that I can share from my experiences.
Tips for Spanking Beginners
Find a lover you trust. I would never get too kinky with someone I hardly knew for safety reasons. Anyways, often the best sex comes when you are at your most comfortable which takes time. And when it comes to any BDSM activities you do need a lot of trust.
Discuss boundaries. Even with your most trusted partners, it’s a good idea to share what your limits are, or what you think they are. Some people use safe words, while others are okay to voice their discomfort at what is going on in the moment. Spanking lies on spectrum… some lovers just want it soft with a fun and playful approach while others prefer pain and humiliation as a focus.
Engage in role plays. I can never toot the role-play horn enough when it comes to kink. It’s a fun way to act out any fantasy and to use your imagination. And like any theatrical performance—props, costumes, and accessories only add to the magic. Role playing is perfect for couples who identify as dominant and submissive.
Try different implements. Newbies to spanking are encouraged to just use your hand to test the waters. Open vs. closed, and cupped vs. flat will give your lover different sensations. If you and your t-gal are enjoying spanking, then move on to some favorite accessories such as riding crops, floggers, paddles, wooden spoons, and belts.
Vary technique and position. The most exciting thing about spanking is the anticipation of it all. This is why blindfolds are the perfect complement. Repeating the same pressure and rhythm will get boring fast, so be sure to vary the intensity and pacing. Also switch up your positions from the classic over-the-lap to bent over a chair or standing… while handcuffed!
What spanking tips or experiences can you share? Let us know your thoughts in the comments.