I was at a family BBQ last weekend with my T-girl friend Misty, who is dating a favorite cousin. She always brings a killer coleslaw and homemade hot sauce to these affairs. Most of the family has already met Misty.
So I wasn’t the only one mortified when an elderly uncle looked back and forth from Ben to Misty in confusion and then said, “Oh, Benji, I didn’t know you were gay.”
Misty is pretty easy going, and sadly used to these gaffes, so she didn’t miss a beat and just handed Uncle Eddie a drumstick.
It’s a common misconception that persists—men who are attracted to transgender women are gay. It’s ironic, because we know with absolute certainty this is not the case. One way we know is the free market—transexual porn gets no hits on gay men’s websites, even “shemale” porn that features cock. On heterosexual sites, trans porn is extremely popular.
This makes perfect sense. Transgender women are women.
Here are five reasons why guys are turned on by transexuals.
Straight men are attracted to women.
The list starts off with the most obvious. Men who love women are aroused by different women: blonde women, chubby women, black women, Latina women, tall women, transgender women.
Trans attraction is their sexual orientation.
Some folks consider trans attraction to be its own orientation. This is often the case for those guys who are mainly attracted to transgender women, and seldom to cis women. When they face condemnation, or are dismissed for objectifying T-girls or having their desire called a kink or fetish, they defend their position as an orientation.
They are curious.
Sex is about novelty, taboo, and the unknown. A lot of our sexual attraction and arousal is about what if. We are curious what someone looks like naked, or how it would feel to experience something or someone.
There was a person-specific attraction.
Many dudes have a range of themes and kinks in their porn cache—yours might include fem-dom, Catholic school plaid skirts, threesomes, and transgender. Or you might not have a specific response to trans at all. Either way, you’re not driven by a particular attraction to trans culture or bodies—you got here because of a specific girl.
You happened to meet and like a T-girl, or found yourself turned on for the first time by a trans woman at the office who happens to be a knockout.
Trans women are ultra feminine.
She may have a penis, which proves that body parts are beyond the point. Ironically, many men are trans attracted because transgender women are so feminine.
Being a jeans and ponytail kind of girl myself, I am super glad I don’t have to wear hats and gloves and pantyhose all the time. But I also get a sexual charge when I meet women who put so much into their presentation—perfume, a manicure, a silk scarf, long lashes, fancy earrings, or just sitting and standing with the grace and poise of old Hollywood.
Lots of guys love athletic chicks in kicks and sweats, but if you happen to get hot over the ultra feminine details, there aren’t that many women around who go all out. Trans women are more likely to bother because they identify with the visible markers of femininity.
What about you? Tell us why you’re a trans admirer in the comments!